Go now, please.

But that is not how things are. That is not how life is. That is not how people are. And that is not how you should be.

Listen to me. Listen now. Stop whining and lend me your ear – the right one. Now listen, once and for all – though I shall not hesitate repeating it for you all life long, whenever you might need to hear it – and I know you will. As will I. Nasiyaan, yes? So listen here.

Childhood is good. Golden, for most. And they later lament growing up. But dear God, if we were not to grow up, what would we do of our childhoods? We absolutely had to grow up so that our childhoods might be of some use.
For some, it is not good. It turns them blue forever. The strong ones turn the blue into a brighter shade. The weak ones let it dim, further dim, into grey. Even weaker ones ink it black.

Childhood is gone. It had to go. It came to go, as all mankind. We come to go. But between coming and going, there is a lot to be learnt and taught, a lot to do, a lot to let happen. So learn. And teach. And let life happen. Then learn more. And teach more. Learn by evolving, teach by being. Do something. The world will not accommodate you by itself. You have to make your own space. Criticize all thoughts, yes. But do it for a purpose, take something from it. Don’t do it for the sake of criticism, don’t do it for the sake of uniqueness, don’t do it for the sake of rebellion. Do it to actually do something.

And please, do something. You cannot let things be. It is in your power to bring a change. Do something as small as voting, or as big as introducing a reformed educational system. Don’t just badmouth the politicians, or politics itself. Do something about it. We write, we think, and we read. But what do we do? Study, if you’re doing that, but think, and plan on what you’ll do when you’re able to. And take my word for it, you can always do something. You’re small, but you make the universe. It is people like you who do great things, things that impact the world.

You cry about people wronging you. And you cry about people being ignorant of your affections, ignorant of the world, ignorant of people. You cry about people coming and going. Rise above that. Hold your heart. Look to those who are with you, and there are always some who are with you. And when no one is, He is. People are people. For others, you are people. It is okay. Rise above that. Life is about so much more.

You cry about messed up circumstances. Take my word for it, circumstances are so much worse in our heads than they really are. So don’t think too much. You’ll only tangle the wool more. Settle on something which gives you peace, and hold on to it. Faith gives you peace. Hold on to it. Circumstances don’t shape what happens to you, how you deal with them does. So deal. All will happen as you want it to, if you can hold on long enough.

And you. Stop crying. Pull on a strong countenance. Move forward. Flashbacks are flashbacks, don’t let them deprive you of the present. Sad thoughts are your own thoughts. Don’t let them dampen your spirits. Don’t indulge them. Do not.

Take that chair, pull it out, set your head down on it and think hard. Only five minutes. And then leave the seat with a plan. They tell you planned lives are boring. Don’t believe them. You can plan blank spots too.

This is how it is. But don’t believe me. Go now.

People and places make for experiences

The years I’ve spent in this world have taught me a lot. People have given me lessons to treasure, places have lent their experiences to me and I always find nature willing to contribute to my knowledge, wisdom and experience, of which I have little at this age.

There’s one friend who taught me to think in a twisted way. She thinks a lot-unnecessarily. And then she worries. And then she becomes crazy over all the worst possible outcomes of whatever has happened. She taught me to control and direct my thoughts. But she also taught me to think in a twisted way. About every aspect of everything. I control it, but I find it useful at times.  She also taught me to value little things. To accept one’s shortcomings, though she often doesn’t do that herself. She taught me to accept situations, and do something about them rather than fretting over them in a non-productive way. She doesn’t do it, but she taught me to, unconsciously.

Then there’s this other friend who is apparently very careless, but at the same time, very responsible. She gives me maturity. She taught me to take everything together, to balance life. I haven’t learned to do it completely, but I’ll get there. She also taught me to cope with whatever life throws at us. I see her struggling and I see myself struggling and I see both of us getting the better of situations we never thought we’d get through. She has a love-hate relationship with life. And in all her uniqueness, that relationship suits her. She’s one of the most thoughtful people I’ve met, and one of the most productive as well. She might not have the best of everything, but she makes the best of what she has. She’s obviously a treasure.

A third friend, who is equally important for me, taught me respect. For everything. Having gone through some very tough situations in life, she’s the most realistic person I’ve come across. She might not be very optimistic, but it saves her from getting crushed by expectations. No, she’s not hopeless-just realistic. She plans the future but she keeps it loose enough to accommodate changes and spontaneous decisions. She expects from life but she keeps it real enough to be able to cope with disappointment. She’s traditional but she keeps the world on track. She teaches me time and again, to plan, to expect but to keep it real at the same time.

There’s another friend I love, and she taught me to express. She taught me to not restrain myself unnecessarily. She taught me that life is not all about rules, it’s not all about others and yet, it’s not all about ourselves. It’s about itself, in reality. She’s the wind

Everyone I know or meet even if very briefly, they teach me something. Passing people teach me too, sometimes by their appearance, sometimes by the phrases of their conversation that the wind brings to me, and sometimes by the way they look at me, other people or the environment. The people I encounter in public transport, they speak volumes without actually speaking too. They teach.

Nature teaches too. My university is the best place I’ve been to. It has trees that whisper secrets, and some of them don’t even need to whisper. Their majestic roots and beards speak for themselves. And oh those twisted trees in the park, they have a very weird structure with which I do not agree. And that is what they teach me. The other trees? They teach me that we’re here to stay whether we like it or not. And that we get through tough times. We’re never tested for more than we can bear. The little ones teach me that we’ll grow-with all the chaos to the side, we’ll grow and we’ll grow strong.

The buildings have a lot to tell us too. They’re old and huge and open. They have cracked walls and tall windows. And then there are the new buildings in contrast to them, with their shiny glass and fresh paint, new desks, clean boards and modern architecture. The library is huge. There’s a world of volumes in there. Its massive structure has been standing for decades, and it has a withered look but it remains poised. It tells me it has experience. That with age comes elegance, comes experience, comes wisdom. There’s a long path that goes from the main gate of the university to the faculty of arts. It teaches perseverance to everyone who walks on it. owing to its length and traffic… I find the path beautiful. I refer to it as the path of the righteous, since it’s so long and straight and tests our patience to limits.

My point here: Everything teaches everything. Provided we’re willing to learn.

I’ve been told to Shine On…

Recently, my friend White Pearl gave me an award; Shine On. I am thankful to her… And also proud of her. Shine on, white pearl. Shine on, bloggers. And hopefully, me too.

When I started blogging, I didn’t expect to get so caught up in it, nor did I expect real people to actually read what I’ve written. At first, I was quite excited by the concept of blogging. It was new to me. I guess it was new to the world at that time. I started writing on my blog “Grey Matter of a Defaced Teen”… About 5 years ago I guess. I wrote and wrote for a long while. Content with little to no readers. But it was an enjoyable experience. Then I went through a few changes, and when I looked at my blog after that, it seemed so immature and extremely meaningless to me. Me being me, I don’t like things without purpose. Everything has to have a purpose. If i’m blogging, I have a purpose, though it might not be quite obvious to the readers. If i’m reading, I have a purpose, and if i’m restraining myself from something, there always has to be a reason. I don’t believe in doing stuff just for the fun of it, or just because I feel like it. I used to, but not anymore. I try to give a valid purpose to everything I do. Life’s much better that way.

So I deleted that blog then. And didn’t continue blogging for a long while after that. I guess after I realized how meaningless it was, I let go of the concept, and of the belief that I could write. School ended after a while, and I started college. Some more life-changing moments came by to visit, and to stay. And I decided to pick up the pen (or the keyboard) again. That was when this blog came into existence. Looking at this blog, i’m not saying it’s good, or has great quality, but I see the change. I see a hint of maturity in what I write. I see purpose. And I like it.

So, Ms. White Pearl, I hope you see how much this award means to me.

As for the people I’d like to give this award to, some of them already have it, and some have just got it today along with myself. But hey, I’m nominating you again, since you’re the ones that I think deserve it.

1) Wild Innocence
2) Dareechay
3) Neurodrooling
4) Randomly Abstract
5) Portfolio Passions and Purple
6) My Un-Puzzled Heart
7) Tiny Toes
8) Post-it Happiness
9) The Writer in me
10) The Seeker

Happy(and Purposeful) Blogging, Everyone!

~Moniba.